Zika Virus: An Update

Aedes mosquito-01The Zika virus was first isolated from a Rhesus Macaque monkey in 1947 in the Zika Forest in Uganda (zika meaning “overgrown” in the Luganda language–gotta love useless trivia!); it was first isolated from a human in 1954 in Nigeria. It appeared sporadically along the equator in Africa and Asia for several decades until it spread to French Polynesia in 2013 and then to Latin America, Mexico, the Caribbean, and now the US.

Illness from Zika was rare until the pandemic began in 2007. The illness it caused was mild and self-limited until October 2015, when we began to see babies with microcephaly (very small brains) born to mothers who had been infected while pregnant. Evidence shows that these babies may also have eye abnormalities that will  effect their vision. There have been links to serious deformities in the joints in the arms and legs of affected babies. A report published August 30, 2016 noted that 6% of the babies affected by Zika also have hearing loss. According to the AAP as of November 4, 2016, their are five main birth defects: severe microcephaly with partially collapsed skull, decreased brain tissue with subcortical calcifications, extreme muscle tone, eye damage with macular scarring and increased pigment, and limited joint motion range.

There have now been more than 1500 cases of microcephaly in Brazil; in the most severe areas the incidence has been as high as 1:100 births.  On August 15, 2016 a state of emergency was declared in Puerto Rico, where they now have 10,690 confirmed Zika cases, including 1,035 pregnant women. Currently, more than 500 pregnant women in the US have shown evidence of a possible Zika infection.

Symptoms

Zika is a flavivirus related to Dengue, Chikungunya, and West Nile encephalitis. It is transmitted by several species of Aedes mosquitos which can, after biting an infected human, infect another person. Transmission has also been reported through blood transfusions and sexual contact.

The newly infected person may not have any symptoms at all, or may develop symptoms of illness within 2 weeks: fever, a bumpy red rash, sore joints, and pink eye. Less common symptoms include aching muscles, headache, and vomiting. The illness itself is usually mild and self limited.

Treatment

There is no preventative vaccine available yet and no treatment, other than pushing fluids, resting, and treating the symptoms with acetaminophen (Tylenol). The ill person should not take aspirin, ibuprofen (Motrin, Advil), or naproxen (Aleve) until Dengue fever is ruled out, to avoid the risk of bleeding.

Where is it?

As of now, local transmission has been reported in more than 0 countries and territories. Current recommendations are that women who are pregnant, especially in their first trimester, do not travel to any of these areas. If they have to travel, they should do what they can to protect themselves from mosquito bites: wear long pants and long sleeved shirts, preferably treated with permethrin insect repellant; sleep in air conditioned rooms, screened in areas or with permethrin treated mosquito nets; and wear insect repellant, because these mosquitos are active during the daytime.

If you do travel to these areas and develop the symptoms of Zika after returning home, pregnant or not, see your doctor. Avoid mosquitos for the first few days, so that you will not be the source of spreading infection.

Men who have had Zika should use barriers during sex for at least 6 months after the infection; women for 8 weeks. Use of a barrier is recommended for at least 8 weeks after travel to endemic areas even if you have no symptoms.

As of today, we have had 1962 confirmed cases of the infection in the US, with 413 in Florida. Twenty eight of those were caught from local mosquitos. We have the Aedes mosquito along our southern coast and in southern California.

Prevention

In all likelihood the same measures we used to contain Denque in the US will contain Zika, but its spread is still possible. Taking precautions is certainly sensible.

  • Get rid of standing, stagnant water.
  • Clean up piles of garbage, because mosquitos love to breed in trash.
  • Put up or repair your window screens.
  • Spray.

Another possibility to limit spread of the infection is releasing GMO mosquitos with a lethal gene, to decrease the population of the bugs. When this was done in the Caman Islands the mosquito population decreased by 80%.

If you are pregnant, stay out of the endemic areas when possible. Take sensible precautions: clean up standing water and trash, put up or repair window screens, and wear insect repellant.

And keep an eye out for current recommendations from public health officials, because the places and numbers change daily.

DomesticatedMomster
The Blogger's Pit Stop

Why Did My Kid React to That Food?

Little chief-cook tasting the carrotKids can have reactions to food for many different reasons. They can be allergic, sensitive, intolerant, or have problems because the food contains poisons or has drug effects.

Food allergies are caused by a child’s immune system reacting to a food, similar to the way they can react to pollen or bug bites. Allergic reactions are usually to the protein in the food rather than the sugar or fat, and are usually immediate. The most common severe reactions are to tree nuts, peanuts, and shellfish. Less severe reactions are most common with cow’s milk, eggs, soy, wheat, and fish.

Celiac disease is in this category. People with celiac are allergic to the gluten protein in wheat and react with their immune system if they are exposed to even a tiny amount. Gluten allergy was worth a whole blog all by itself: A Gluten Free Blog.

80-90% of the time, kids will outgrow allergies to eggs, wheat, milk, and soy by 5 years of age. They outgrow peanut allergies only 20% of the time. (Do NOT experiment with this!) Fewer will outgrow allergies to tree nuts and seafood.

Symptoms of an allergic reaction include:

  • Skin rashes. Hives, or whelps–itchy raised patches with pale centers and red rims. Hives move around, fading in one area to reappear in another. Antihistamines like Benadryl (diphenhydramine) help the symptoms.
  • Breathing problems. Food reactions can make kids wheeze, make their throats feel tight, and give them sneezing fits.
  • Gastrointestinal symptoms like nausea, vomiting, and  diarrhea.
  • Circulatory symptoms like paleness, lightheadedness, and loss of consciousness.
  • Severe reactions can involve several of these areas, and are called anaphylaxis.

Food sensitivities and intolerances are not allergies. Some children can be sensitive to the common effects of a food and react strongly. For example:

  • Apples, pears and bananas contain pectin and can be constipating (useful if your child has diarrhea). Some children can get stopped up if they eat too many.
  • Dairy products can also constipate–some kids will never poop again if they eat a lot of cheese. (This may be a slight exaggeration.)
  • Sugar can cause diarrhea, so children may have problems if they drink a lot of juice. (Interestingly, we have never been able to prove that sugar makes kids hyper.)
  • Kids can react to dyes and preservatives in foods–they will feel nauseated or tired, and we have proven that red dye can make them hyper.
  • Lactose intolerance is an reaction to the sugar in milk. People who are lactose intolerant are missing the enzyme (lactase) that breaks down the sugar in milk (lactose). They get bloating, gas, and diarrhea.

There are certainly plants that contain toxins (poisons) in themselves–poisonous mushrooms, apple seeds, and belladonna are examples–but most poisonings are accidental, usually from foods that have spoiled:

  • C. Botulinium bacteria grows in improperly canned food and in cans that have rusted through.When we used to give Karo syrup for constipation, the bacteria would grow in Karo left on a cupboard shelf and children would die, paralyzed by the neurotoxin (nerve poison) that the bacteria produced.
  • Staph Aureus can grow in spoiled food and produce a toxin that is usually self limited in its effect, giving kids cramping, diarrhea, and vomiting.
  • Clostridium perfringens produces a similar toxin, and is frequently the villain in cafeteria incidents and contaminations in soil and sewage.
  • Salmonella can grow in spoiled meat, eggs, and milk and give your child diarrhea, vomiting and fever.
  • E. coli is more likely to grow in beef, but can be found in mishandled produce. Same unpleasant symptoms.
  • Shigella is common in daycare outbreaks. It causes the same nausea, vomiting, diarrhea, and fever, but has the added risk of seizures from the toxin it produces.

Foods can also have drug effects. The best examples of this are drinks (coffee, tea, energy drinks) and food (chocolate) that contain caffeine. Caffeine makes kids restless, shaky, and interferes with their sleep. In large doses, as with energy drinks, it can produce a rapid heartbeat, muscle tremors and seizures. There were 20,783 emergency room visits from energy drinks in 2011; 5 people died after consuming them. The youngest was a 14 year old girl.

Foods can also be irritants. For example, babies can get rashes around their mouths or diaper rashes from acidic foods.

People do not react to a food solely because it is a GMO (genetically modified organism)–GMOs are not something you need to avoid unless you have a reaction to the particular item. GMO wheat produces the same allergens as non-GMO wheat; if you are allergic to one, you will be allergic to the other. Also the subject of an entire blog: What’s the Deal with GMOs?

In conclusion, not every food reaction is a food allergy. Avoidance or treatment of the food reaction varies with the actual cause. If a child has an anaphylactic allergic reaction to peanuts, he or she never needs to be around peanuts again. They may outgrow other allergies. If they get gassy from a lactose intolerance, they can take lactase tablets when they eat dairy. Kids who become constipated with apples or cheese need to limit the number they eat. It is always important for every child to not be fed spoiled food or energy drinks.

Knowing in what way your child reacted to a food determines what you do about it in the future. Knowledge rules.

Domesticated Momster
Rhyming with Wine
Rhyming with Wine

Fever is Good. Really.

sick kid-01In about 400 BC, Hippocrates said “Give me the power to create a fever, and I shall cure any disease.” Hippocrates knew that fever was a symptom of disease, not the disease itself. It is the body’s response to illness-its defense against infection.

It’s 2400 years later, and I still spend my days telling people that fever is good, we want fever, fever means that our child’s immune system is working… Fever rules!

A normal human oral temperature is between 97.6 and 99.6 degrees Fahrenheit (37.5 – 38.3 Centigrade). Rectal temps are about a degree higher, axillary and ear temps about a degree lower. Temperatures vary by about a degree through the day, increase when you exercise, and vary from person to person.

The most common cause of fever is infection, but there are other causes: illicit drug use (amphetamines and cocaine), medicine side effects, brain trauma, heat stroke, cancer, vaccine reactions, hyperthyroidism, and inflammatory diseases like lupus, rheumatoid arthritis, and irritable bowel disease. Most of the non-infectious causes give a persistent fever, while fever from infection generally gets better after 3-5 days.

Note that teething was not on that list. Teething can increase a baby’s body temp a little, but not to the point of fever.

Pediatricians define fever as a rectal temp above 100.4 F. Random, but it works as a general rule of thumb.

We get fever when a part of the brain called the hypothalamus is triggered by “pyrogens,” which cause release of prostaglandin E2. Prostaglandin E2 resets the hypothalamus to a higher temperature, like the thermostat in a house. This causes peripheral blood vessels to constrict (thus your munchkins cold hands), generation of more heat, and shivering (small muscle constriction to generate even more heat).

Fever works to fight infection in a variety of ways. High temperatures:

  • Limit the spread of a virus (like the common cold),  by blocking that virus’s ability to explode the cells in which it has been multiplying to spread further throughout your body.
  • Hinder a bacteria (like strep throat)’s ability to divide and make more bacteria.
  • White blood cells, the cells that fight infection, move around better with a fever.
  • White blood cells also chomp on bacteria better with that high temp (phagocytosis).
  • Toxins produced by bacteria don’t work as effectively with a fever.
  • T-cells, which also fight infection, proliferate better.

Fever is good.

There are doctors who will tell people that they should never treat a fever. I, however, am in the “treat for comfort” camp. Fever generally makes kids feel tired (not always a bad thing), fussy, and can make them feel cold. It is uncomfortable and can burn off a lot of fluid at a time when we want our children to stay hydrated. A rapid change in temperature in a young child (6 months to about 5 years) can cause a febrile seizure. If your child is miserable, not drinking as much as you would like, or in pain from a sore throat or headache, acetaminophen or ibuprofen will help him or her to feel better.

Brain damage occurs with temperatures above 108 F (42 C), with things like anesthesia reactions and heat stroke. Only in Hollywood do you get brain damage from a common illness with a 104 F  temperature.

Normal childhood viral infections like colds and gastroenteritis generally trigger fevers in the 99 F to 104 F range. Fevers tend to go up a little in the morning, improve during the day, and spike higher at night. That 103 temperature that improves during the day but then spikes at 10 PM is actually pretty reassuring, because that is the classic viral fever curve. Kids generally get better on their own with rest, fluids, and time.

Bacterial infections, like strep throat, pneumonia, or sepsis, are more serious and sometimes need treatment with antibiotics. They classically give fever all day long, rather than in that morning and evening viral pattern. They are accompanied by symptoms specific to the source of the infection, like lethargy, breathing problems, sore throat, earache, or pain with urination.

So, when to worry? Your doc will want to see any baby under 3 months with a fever, because their immune systems are inexperienced at that age. We like to see kids with 104 F temperatures or fevers that persist longer than 3 nights, just to make sure there isn’t anything bad going on. Call us if your munchkin has trouble breathing, lethargy, inconsolable irritability, an earache, or pain with urination. We like to see kids with fever if they have compromised immune systems or serious medical problems. We like to see kids with fever caused by heat stroke rather than infection.

Never throw them into a cool bath or rub them down with alcohol, because fever seizures are caused by a rapid change in temperature, not by the actual height of the temperature. It is safe to give a child a tepid bath about an hour after they have a dose of acetaminophen or ibuprofen, because the medicine will keep the temperature from bouncing back up.

Never give aspirin to kids because it has been linked to Reye’s syndrome.

And if you’re worried, call your pediatrician. It’s what we’re here for.

Domesticated Momster

Lead, and the Children of Flint

Toddler-Playing-With-A-Chair-01In April of 2014 politicians in Flint, Michigan changed the city’s water supply from Lake Huron and the Detroit River to the Flint River, in order to save money. The water from the Flint River was more acidic and had more salt and chlorine in it, and it corroded the aging lead pipes through which it flowed, allowing lead into the water and poisoning the inhabitants of Flint.

The EPA allows 15 ppm (parts per million) of lead in drinking water. Water from homes in Flint tested as high as 13.2 thousand ppm. Lead levels in children’s blood doubled, then doubled again.

Nontombi Naomi Tutu said we “needed the people of Flint to remind the people of this country what happens when political expediency, when financial concerns, overshadow justice and humanity.”

Why do we worry about Lead?

Lead is a soft gray heavy metal that functions in our bodies as a neurotoxin–it poisons nerves. Acute lead poisoning causes headaches, stomach pain, clumsiness, agitation or drowsiness, convulsions and death.

Chronic lead poisoning is more insidious. Lead is most harmful to infants, children and pregnant woman, because it damages developing nerves. Kids who are poorly nourished will be more affected because deficiencies in iron, calcium and zinc increase their body’s absorption of lead. Babies are more at risk because they live closer to floors and surfaces and everything goes into their mouths. Exposed children:

  • can lose cognitive function and develop speech and reading problems.
  • can be unable to focus and organize their thoughts, and exhibit behavior problems.
  • have a higher school dropout rate, problems with aggression, and a higher rate of delinquency.
  • can have damage to their hearing.
  • will have problems growing because lead messes with their ability to use Vitamin D and iron.
  • become anemic, which leaves them less able to transport oxygen around their bodies.
  • can cause damage to their kidneys, giving them lifelong problems with hypertension and cardiovascular disease.

Where is lead found?

When I was a kid we wrote with lead pencils and had lead in our gasoline!

Nowadays, lead is used in some industries, found in deteriorating lead paint in old houses, and leached out of old lead water pipes and pipes with lead solder. We also occasionally run into it in old toys, old Christmas decorations, and jewelry, and in toys, ceramics and cans imported from other countries. Cosmetics such as surma and kohl can have lead, as can some home remedies and dietary supplements. A few years ago there were crayons with lead in them. The manufacturer said, “Kids weren’t supposed to eat them!”

Ideally, we prevent lead poisoning.

  • If you work in an industry that uses lead, take off your shoes when you enter your home.
  • Don’t give your kids old toys and jewelry to chew on.
  • If you have lead pipes in your home, run the water for 30 seconds before you use any of it to drink or cook, because lead will gradually leach from the pipes it is sitting in. Never drink or cook with water run hot from the tap–hot water leaches out more lead.
  • If you live in an old house, clean up peeling paint and household dust with a wet mop.
  • Check for lead paint before any home renovations.
  • If you have well water, test it for lead. Most well filters do remove lead.
  • Give your child a nutritious diet to avoid deficiencies in iron, calcium, and zinc.

Treatment for Lead Poisoning:

Pediatricians generally check children’s lead levels at 12 months and sometimes 2 years, and any time there is concern.

Treatment of lead poisoning varies with how high the level is.

Between 5 and 45 mcg/dl, treatment involves finding and eliminating the source and optimizing the child’s nutrition. Levels as low as 5 mcg/dl have been shown to have lasting effects on children, but chelation therapy at these levels has not been proven to have any effect on kids’ cognitive ability or behavior.

Kids with levels over 45 mcg/dl need to be treated with chelating agents, which can be quite dangerous. Chelators bind the metal in the blood and improve its excretion into urine and stool. Unfortunately chelators also bind minerals that your child’s body needs for normal growth and development. Also, kids can be allergic to the chelators, and the medicine can damage their liver or kidneys.

Far better to prevent the exposure.

I do not have words for how horribly the people of Flint were betrayed by their elected officials.

Some resources if you have concerns:

  • EPA Safe Drinking Water Hotline  800-426-4791
  • Poison Control 800-222-1222
  • Pediatric Environmental Health Specialty Unit Network (PEHSU) 888-347-2632

 

Domesticated Momster

Zika Virus and the Brain of the Unborn

Aedes mosquito-01The Zika virus was first isolated from a Rhesus Macaque monkey in 1947 in the Zika Forest in Uganda (zika meaning “overgrown” in the Luganda language–gotta love useless trivia!); it was first isolated from a human in 1954 in Nigeria. It appeared sporadically along the equator in Africa and Asia for several decades until it spread to French Polynesia in 2013 and then to Latin America, Mexico, the Caribbean, and now the US.

Illness from Zika was rare until the pandemic began in 2007. The illness it caused was mild and self-limited until October 2015, when we began to see babies with microcephaly (very small brains) born to mothers who had been infected while pregnant. New evidence shows that these babies may also have eye abnormalities that will  effect their vision.

There have now been more than 1500 cases of microcephaly in Brazil; in the most severe areas the incidence has been as high as 1:100 births.  On August 15, 2016 a state of emergency was declared in Puerto Rico, where they now have 10,690 confirmed Zika cases, including 1,035 pregnant women. Currently, more than 500 pregnant women in the US have shown evidence of a possible Zika infection.

Symptoms

Zika is a flavivirus related to Dengue, Chikungunya, and West Nile encephalitis. It is transmitted by several species of Aedes mosquitos which can, after biting an infected human, infect another person. Transmission has also been reported through blood transfusions and sexual contact.

The newly infected person may not have any symptoms at all, or may develop symptoms of illness within 2 weeks: fever, a bumpy red rash, sore joints, and pink eye. Less common symptoms include aching muscles, headache, and vomiting. The illness itself is usually mild and self limited.

Treatment

There is no preventative vaccine available yet and no treatment, other than pushing fluids, resting, and treating the symptoms with acetaminophen (Tylenol). The ill person should not take aspirin, ibuprofen (Motrin, Advil), or naproxen (Aleve) until Dengue fever is ruled out, to avoid the risk of bleeding.

Where is it?

As of now, local transmission has been reported in more than 50 countries and territories. Current recommendations are that women who are pregnant, especially in their first trimester, do not travel to any of these areas. If they have to travel, they should do what they can to protect themselves from mosquito bites: wear long pants and long sleeved shirts, preferably treated with permethrin insect repellant; sleep in air conditioned rooms, screened in areas or with permethrin treated mosquito nets; and wear insect repellant, because these mosquitos are active during the daytime.

If you do travel to these areas and develop the symptoms of Zika after returning home, pregnant or not, see your doctor. Avoid mosquitos for the first few days, so that you will not be the source of spreading infection.

Men who have had Zika should use barriers during sex for at least 6 months after the infection; women for 8 weeks. Use of a barrier is recommended for at least 8 weeks after travel to endemic areas even if you have no symptoms.

As of today, we have had 1962 confirmed cases of the infection in the US, with 413 in Florida. Twenty eight of those were caught from local mosquitos. We have the Aedes mosquito along our southern coast and in southern California.

Prevention

In all likelihood the same measures we used to contain Denque in the US will contain Zika, but its spread is still possible. Taking precautions is certainly sensible.

  • Get rid of standing, stagnant water.
  • Clean up piles of garbage, because mosquitos love to breed in trash.
  • Put up or repair your window screens.
  • Spray.

Another possibility to limit spread of the infection is releasing GMO mosquitos with a lethal gene, to decrease the population of the bugs. When this was done in the Caman Islands the mosquito population decreased by 80%.

If you are pregnant, stay out of the endemic areas when possible. Take sensible precautions: clean up standing water and trash, put up or repair window screens, and wear insect repellant.

And keep an eye out for current recommendations from public health officials, because the places and numbers change daily.

 

Domesticated Momster

Parenting: Top Ten Transforming New Year’s Resolutions

storkHappy New Year! Time for those resolutions. This year, instead of resolving to lose that last ten pounds or eat more veggies (although I will applaud you if you do), resolve to do the best job at parenting. The reward is so much bigger than going down a clothing size! So, my Top 10 Amazing New Year’s Parenting Resolutions:

I will henceforth…

10. Require chores. Equal participation is fundamental to receive the reward of being in a family. The pride your child feels serving the carrots he helped peel is well worth the time it takes to get him to do it. Every member of the family contributes, to the best of their ability. Family bonds and trust will form over the raking of leaves.

9.   Make rules, and enforce them consistently. Rules keep kids safe, teach them right from wrong, and civilize them. Make sure your child understands the rules, and every single adult in his life needs to enforce every rule each and every time, the first time it is broken. No “warnings,” because you made sure ahead of time that they understood the rule. Decide what the consequence will be for a broken rule long before you need to do it; make the punishment appropriate for the crime (timeout? loss of the toy? paying for the damage?).

8.   Feed my munchkin a healthy diet: whole foods that look like they either grew out of the ground or walked on it (I know, but not everyone is a vegetarian). Teach your children to eat when they’re hungry, and stop eating when they’re not hungry anymore. Aim for about half fruits and vegies and about half protein (meat, eggs, cheese, beans or nuts) and starch (potatoes, bread, pasta, corn). Everything else will be easier if they are well nourished.

7.   Keep a regular sleep schedule – both enough hours and at about the same time every day – as much as possible. Kids who are short on sleep are irritable, tired and have no attention span. Everything else will be easier if he or she has had enough sleep.

6.   Keep them safe when I can. There are lots of surprises out there to keep life interesting; there is no need to risk the preventable injuries. Use those seat belts and bike helmets, lock up the household poisons, guns and Grandma’s meds, and get those vaccines.

5.   Teach financial responsibility. Spend less than you make, stay out of debt, and save for the future. Do it where they can see you and explain what you are doing. Go through your budget with them in an age appropriate way, and feel free to say, “We can’t afford that.” Give them an allowance for those chores and require that they save some.

4.   Not wear blinders. Your primary job is to protect this child, even if it is sometimes from themselves. Children will lie, take things that are not theirs, and sneak out at night when they are 14. You need to catch them so that they learn that it doesn’t work. If they get caught stealing at 7, they have an embarrassing memory of having to go back and pay for what they took. If they get caught at 25, they land in jail and loose their job, partner, and children.

3.   Give them love without condition the child you have, not the one you dreamed they would be. Love is not a prize you can give when your child is good, and take away when they do not live up to your expectations. Without the absolute faith that no matter what happens or what horrible thing they do you will still love them, the foundation on which they build their life will by shaky and unstable. You chose to have them; unconditional love was part of the deal.

2.   Nurture my child’s unique talents and abilities; don’t try to fit the ones you want them to have on their unsuitable frame. This little person is an original – why would you want to shove him or her into a standard form? And what irreplaceable gifts would be forever lost because you did not value them? Respect the exceptional person that he or she is.

1.   Inspire them with myown life. Be what you hope for them. Find work you love, maintain a healthy relationship with your partner, eat a healthy diet, and exercise. Learn something new every day. Never lie. Give respect, and demand it for yourself. Keep an open mind, explore the world and grab opportunities when they happen by. Make your children proud.

“It’s Just a Cold…”

Adorable child dressed as doctor playing with toy over white

Happy cold and flu season! How many times have you taken your child to the doctor and been told, “It’s just a virus. Rest, push fluids, and they’ll feel better in about 10 days”?

Sadly, it’s true. There are hundreds of different viruses that cause colds, from the most common rhinovirus through the ever-unpleasant adenovirus to the rather pretty coronavirus (it has a crown…).

We can’t fix any of them.

All of them are contagious. All you have to do to catch one is breathe around someone who has one, or touch a surface that someone infectious has recently touched and then rub your nose or eyes. After a 2 or 3 day incubation period you will wake up to a scratchy throat and headache and you too will be infectious (mostly for the first 3 days).

Children catch an average of 8-10 colds during the first two years of their lives; they average 6-8 colds per year during their school years. Since most colds occur from October through March, this means 1-2 colds per month, lasting 10 days each. If it seems like your children are sick all the time, it’s because… they are sick all the time.

Symptoms of a cold include fever, red watery eyes, congestion, cough, tiredness and decreased appetite. Your child’s ears might feel plugged up. Watery nasal discharge can turn thick and green after a day or two (this doesn’t mean they have a sinus infection, it’s just part of what a virus does).

So how do we keep them as healthy as possible? You probably already know the basics:

  • Wash their hands frequently. Keep those hands away from their eyes, nose and mouth! No nail chewing!
  • Cover their mouths when they sneeze or cough. Elbows or facial tissues work.
  • Disinfect surfaces.
  • Look for small daycares and classes whenever possible (I know, but we can dream).
  • Do what you can to boost their young immune systems. Breastfeeding your infant will make me poor–all that wonderful grown-up immunity transferred to your little one. Never smoke in air your child will inhale. Really. Never. It will destroy their immune system. And yours, by the way. Take probiotics like Acidophilus (in yogurt) or Lactobacillis.
  • Make sure they get enough sleep. If they are sleepy during the day, move their bedtimes up. Tired people get sick.
  • Offer them healthy food, and throw out all the unhealthy food so they will have fewer options when they get hungry.
  • Have lots of fluids available, because hydration is necessary for your body’s defenses to work. And no, I don’t mean soda. Water, dilute juice or milk please.

When your children get sick, treat their symptoms so that they will feel better. We have nothing that cures colds–antibiotics do not kill viruses. Salt water (saline) nose sprays are safe. Tylenol or ibuprofen will help with fever and pain. Over the counter cold meds will suppress some of the symptoms in children over 6 years of age, although they’ve never been proven to work for younger kids.

Call your doctor if the fever lasts more than three days, if your child is lethargic or unusually cranky, or if they have an earache or breathing problems.

Make them rest and drink fluids, and they’ll feel better in about 10 days.

Domesticated Momster

Reading Milestones

ROARlogo2-01This week’s blog comes curtesy of the Reach out and Read program.

Reading together is the single most important thing you can do to develop language skills and learning ability in your children, especially between the ages of six months and five years. Nothing will do more to prepare kids to excel in school: reading increases their vocabulary, their understanding of phonics, familiarity with the printed word, storytelling ability, and comprehension. Snuggling up and reading with your children will also help them feel loved and secure; do this at bedtime and it will help them sleep.

All this is before we get to the actual contents of the books!

For tricks on how to read to tiny people, check out my blog on Growing Brains.

Read, love reading, and encourage your children to love reading and their world will open up with possibilities.

The Reach out and Read people have come up with a very neat chart of reading milestones by age, from six months to five years. I thought I should share. Just click on it to make it bigger:

Reading Milestones

Domesticated Momster

Conflict Resolution in Parenting: Prevention

CinemaUsher-01A good friend of mine, not realizing how complex a subject it was, and how much work it would be, asked me to write a blog about conflict resolution.

He may no longer be on my good list (coal for Christmas, you!), but for the next few weeks I will be blogging about conflict resolution because he got me thinking. This week is for the groundwork: exploring the issues that are at the root of many conflicts between parents. Next week will be about the most (and least) effective ways to fix those conflicts; after that we can expand into parent-child conflicts and those between children.

The first, most important, and absolutely non-negotiable concrete foundation of conflict resolution between parents is that parents are equal partners, and have to respect each other as such. You chose to have a child together. It is the privilege and responsibility of both to parent. It does not matter if you are married, partners, or single, or if one parent is taller, stronger, richer, smarter, more talented…. That child belongs to both of you and needs both of you. I once saw a child in the post office with a parent on either side holding onto an arm and pulling. Don’t do that. Your child is not a rope in a tug of war.

Conflicts can only be resolved by compromise. If one side wholly wins, the other has no choice but to keep fighting. Both sides have to give a little; both have to feel that they have won something. None of us are always right; we can afford to be flexible. In the end it is far more important that your children see that their parents respect each other, can listen to each other and discuss problems, and are able to compromise, than whether or not their bedtime can be changed, or they can go to a party.

If parents cannot respect each other as equals, that is the lesson their child will absorb, and someday he or she might accept something less than respect from their partner.

The structure we build on that foundation is agreement on common goals. It seems, going into parenting, that we should all have the same obvious goals. We want our child alive, healthy, happy, self-confident… Obvious, yes? It’s amazing how much variation there is within these bounds. Ideally, parents discuss and agree on goals for their children before they actually have any. In reality, many parents discuss religion and not much else.

So, ten things to talk about with your partner before things go ka-BOOM:

  1. Where you will live: Having a child is a lifetime commitment, so this means 20 years of where you will live, not just right now. Talk about location, type of home, whether you want to be near family, if you will move for a better job…  whatever is important to you. Things change, and it is nice to know where your partner stands on the subject ahead of time.
  2. Finance: Children need security to feel safe enough to explore and grow. Financial worries can plant their lives on shifting sands. Sit down together and figure out how much money you make, what you will spend it on, and how you will save for an emergency and the future. Make a budget. Your child does not want to loose a parent over the electric bill.
  3. Diet: You want them to be healthy, right? Not to have diabetes at 12, back pain at 15, and heart disease at 40? That means agreeing on what to feed them, and on being a good example yourself. It also includes not using food for emotional support or rewards. And don’t get me started on using food so that your child will like you better than the other parent.
  4. Routines and schedules: How obsessive are you going to be about homework, meal times, and bedtime routines? Routines can be incredibly helpful: kids don’t argue over something (like bedtime) that is a habit. On the other hand, routines can become rigid and squash all random opportunities and creativity. Where do  you put that balance? Routines work only if both parents are in agreement on them, so talk.
  5. Sleeping arrangements: I have seen more than a few marriages end in an ugly divorce over this one. There is really no moral right or wrong on it, but you must both agree. Just don’t co-sleep with a baby under 6 months. I’ve lost two small patients that way, and never want to lose another. Just don’t.
  6. Education: How important is school? (Guess which side I took on this one) Are some subjects more important than others? Do actual grades and the particular school matter, or is it learning and inspiration that is important? How about learning technical skills versus book learning? How about “useful” skills versus not so obviously useful? Did I mention that I also have an a degree in anthropology? I am married to an engineer. We have discussions.
  7. Careers: Which career choices are acceptable, and which are not? You might want to write these down and then switch lists – surprise! When I was a child, my options were nurse, teacher, or housewife. My mother had crossed “nun” off the list and not replaced it with anything. I was a big surprise.
  8. Athletics: How important are sports? Life ending? Or just done to be well rounded and get exercise? Any particular sport in mind?
  9. Criminal behavior: This is a biggie. Children start out as small barbarians, travel through self-involved, and wander into insecure before they become adults. They will try out hitting, biting, lying and stealing along the way. How will you react? What will you do to discourage this behavior?
  10. Privacy: Children have no legal right to privacy. They have what you give them, and they deserve your protection from their own … lack of insight, so their privacy cannot be absolute. Where is that line? How much do you trust before you verify?

So, I have managed to write a blog on conflict resolution without ever discussing how to resolve a conflict. Hmm. We will do that next week. First and foremost: respect your partner and set common goals. Once you have that foundation and framework, everything else falls into place more easily. With a little nudge. Or two.

Build that foundation. If parents endlessly argue and fight, marriages self destruct; if parents cannot treat each other with respect and decide on common goals, children self destruct.

Have that conversation before you need it.